New Year, New Habits-A few thoughts from Dr. Caroline Peyser, the clinical supervisor of Hakshiva’s therapy clinic.

As we mark Rosh Chodesh Elul and begin the new school year, it’s a good time to think about how to start the year off with our kids on the right foot.

Dr. Caroline Peyser.

There may be things we have been thinking about changing for a while that we haven’t gotten around to implementing. Or, maybe there are things we used to do, that we let slide over the summer. Also, as our kids are going back to school, we want to think how we can make this transition smooth for them and how we can make sure to have open lines of communication. This time of year offers a great opportunity to set some new “traditions” in place with these goals in mind.

Here are a few suggestions:

• Dinner time – if you don’t already do this, try eating dinner together on a regular basis. If you don’t yet eat dinner together outside of Shabbos meals, try to add a family dinner night once or twice a week. Let all the kids know in advance what day and time dinner is at, so that they are sure to be there. It’s a great time for family members to talk about their day and for parents to hear what is going on. A great deal of research has been conducted on the benefits of regular family dinners. It shows that it can improve kids’ school performance, raise self-esteem and lower the risk of depression (for more info, see https://thefamilydinnerproject.org/about-us/benefits-of-family-dinners/).

If you are already eating dinner a few times a week together, try making it every night. And, if you are doing it every night – good for you! You                 are already reaping many of the benefits

• Homework time – depending on the age of your children, they may already be doing homework on their own and without a problem. But, some kids need help in this area – either in sitting down to do the homework or getting help with completing it. Why not try to find a set time or place where your kids can sit down to do homework and you can be present and available if they need any help.
• Time to talk – During your child’s first week of school, try to find a quiet time to touch base with them about how they are settling in –How do they like their mechanech/et, how is it going socially, etc. If you make a point of taking an interest from the get go, you let your kids know that you are an address they can go to – to talk about issues that are going on at school or with friends. Even if this is something that you are not used to doing, this is a great time to set up new relationship patterns. The start of the school year is a natural time to ask questions about your child’s daily life and a perfect opportunity to change the relationship status quo.

If your child is having some difficulties, you can intervene early to help support your child. Being in touch with your child’s teacher in the first                 few weeks of school sends a message to the teacher that he/she has a partner with whom to work and difficulties that are arising can be                             addressed early.

Happy Rosh Chodesh!